The Mother of All Season Finales
by Roberta

****

Just a few thought to help out The Writers as they put the finale 
together:

After much fancy footwork involving changing various uniforms a 
dozen times and the ingestion of massive quantities of sugar Jarod 
discovers that his (not even slightly identical) twin is in fact Fox 
Mulder. 

While investigating their convoluted pasts and dealing with a skeptical 
Scully ("I want to believe, Mulder, but science can't explain cross-
overs.") they somehow stumble upon yet another box car full of dead 
aliens sunk into the Mojave desert and Mulder drops his gun. (Jarod: 
"What is it with you and your gun?" Mulder: "What is it with you and 
Miss Parker?") 

As the box car is blown up by Cancer Man ("Kill 'em both--let Miss 
Parker sort 'em out!") and Jarod's shirt becomes inexplicably 
unbuttoned, they together struggle through a mysterious hidden 
tunnel that ends in Bobby Ewing's old shower at South Fork. 

Peering through the dense steam the two disoriented but re-united 
twins discover Heather Locklear, wearing only a towel. "Just the two 
men I've been waiting for!" she exclaims, dropping the towel just as 
smoke fills the room and flames begin to lick at the door. 

A shot rings out. As the camera pans back through a swirl of steam and 
smoke we hear a familiar Scottish accent: "There's a wee problem, 
Captain--I can't  lock on to just you and the crew!"

"Oh, hell," Kirk says, "beam us ALL up, Scotty!" 

END