Buffy Meets Last Knight

by havocthecat
Copyright 1997

Everyone belongs to other people besides me. Joss Whedon has the Buffy people, and Jim Parriott has the Forever Knight people (though with the way he's treated them, I'm surprised he's still got custody). The third one--well, spot the hidden crossover is a game I've always thought was fun.

Oh, and so as not to confuse anyone, this was written just after "Teacher's Pet" aired.

LaCroix lifted the stake high above his head, preparing to grant his son's final request, when he heard the elevator door slide open. Sensing no vampiric presence, he continued to bring the stake downward to its inevitable plunge through Nicholas' heart. LaCroix, stopped, though, upon hearing a woman's voice behind him.

"Hey, vamp-boy. That's my job." He turned, and saw that the owner of the voice was no woman, but a girl, and a young, small one at that. She would be barely a mouthful, but a welcome appetizer, a small roll of sushi, a mouthful of caviar, a dab of Squeez-Cheez before the banquet.

"Come here," he said, his silky tones mesmerizing her. Or so he thought, until LaCroix noticed her staring at him with boredom in her eyes, rather than the mindless adoration and longing he expected. //Perhaps,// thought LaCroix. //She is not one of my devoted listeners. Can this be? Can there be one person out there, one alone who does not adore the Nightcrawler?//

"Look, I don't have all day, I've got friends to meet, term papers to write, vampires to slay, can we just get on with it?" The girl pulled out a book from the backpack she carried, and began reading it, highlighting certain passages. "Sorry, but I've *got* to do well in this class. Mom'll kill me otherwise. I mean, a girl can only go so far in life slaying vampires, she's gotta have some kind of backup career."

"Nicholas!" exclaimed LaCroix. "This cannot be! There is someone in this city who does not focus their attention solely on me! I am sorry, but I cannot grant your request." Nick stood up and whirled around, shock in his eyes. "No, Nicholas," said LaCroix. "The shock...the surprise. They are too much for me. I cannot do this."

"But...LaCroix! Of course there are people in this city who don't focus all their attention on you. I command their attention," Nick said, gazing at the girl with an expression he had reserved for charming unsuspecting barmaids into giving him access to their necks. //Of course, there was that one barmaid in the 1400's, I never could get at her neck. I wonder why not?// He tried to step forward, but fell, his shoelaces somehow having gotten tied together. He looked at Natalie, wondering if she had somehow, miraculously come across, but her face was unmoving, as pale and white as it had been before.

"Natalie," he sighed. "If only you were alive! LaCroix, you must do this for me," Nick said, glancing pointedly at the stake resting in LaCroix's hands.

"What? Are you two just going to wallow, because I can tell you now, it's not going to last that much longer. I mean, you're cute and all--well, one of you is cute--but a Slayer's gotta do what she's just meant to."

"And what would that be?" growled LaCroix.

"I think it's in the title," said Buffy, rolling her eyes.

Casting his stake aside, he stepped towards the girl, noting the veins pulsing at the side of her neck, wondering if her blood would be reminiscent of honey and wine, or if it would be merely the taste of Cherry Coke he found so often in these later years. His progress was impeded by a sharp pain in his chest, and he looked down, surprised to find a small wooden stake protruding from it. As he watched, a tennis-shoed foot flew towards him, shoving the stake through his heart, and out his back. LaCroix opened his mouth, about to order Nicholas to remove the stake when his body began to glow. Before a word could escape, he had fallen into ashes, and had become nothing more than a pile of grey dust on the floor. Before Buffy scattered the ashes, she could hear a plaintive wail, "Have you ever listened to my show..."

Nick growled, the shock of LaCroix's death breaking him out of the suicidal stupor he had been in. His eyes were gold, and he stood up slowly. In a flash, he rushed towards the girl, stopping only to untie his shoelaces and relace them.

He grabbed her from behind, pulled her neck back, and reared his head back for the killing strike. He snarled, and his jaws closed on...empty air. Nick felt his body rush through the air, a rush entirely undirected by him, and heard the "thud" his body made as it landed against the wall, denting the bricks before sliding down them to rest against the floor.

"Adore me," he said, hypnnotism lacing his words. She reminded him so much of Fleur, his beloved sister, his first icon of mortality. She must love him! "Sleep, and forget," he said. It *usually* worked. Now he would go on his way, and she would grow and bear children, and be happy, just like all good women really ought to. He glanced guiltily over at Natalie, and then back down at his shoelaces, which had somehow managed to get laced together again, and this time in a knot worse than before. He struggled to stand up, wondering who had painted the giant cross on the door. Had that been there a moment ago?

"You guys are *all* the same," sighed the girl. "Always thinking with your fangs. I think it's phallic." She jumped over the sofa, and, in one rush, shoved a stake through Nick's heart. As she watched him crumble to ash, the elevator door slid open again, and Willow, Giles, and Xander rushed in.

"What happened?" asked Willow. "Did you kill them? Is she ok?" Willow pointed to Natalie, laying on the floor.

"She looks good...I mean, all right," said Xander.

"Seemingly in perfect health," said Giles, as Natalie stirred and sat up. "They were probably going to feed from her before Buffy intervened." He knelt beside her. "How do you feel?" he asked tenderly.

Natalie looked up at Giles. //Glasses,// she thought. //I can deal with this.//

"I'm ok," she said, leaning against Giles. "Nick?" she asked.

"Dead," said Buffy. "He was trying to kill you. They're both dead."

"Ah," said Natalie. "Good. Faith...some faith that creep had."

"Huh?" asked Xander, puzzled, as usual.

"What will you do now?" asked Giles, holding Natalie closely--purely out of a sense of protectiveness, he told himself.

"I don't know. I just quit my job. I *thought*," said Natalie, scuffing the ashes around. "Nick was going to go away with me."

"Loooveeeee mmmmmeeee," wailed a curiously familiar voice.

"Well," said Giles, looking intently at Natalie through his glasses. "I might have an idea, if you wouldn't mind listening to it."

"Sure," said Natalie, reaching for Nick's remote and opening the windowshades to a very bright and sunny dawn. "Why not? It's not like there's much left for me in Toronto."

"Thanks," said Willow, opening the window and dumping the contents of a dustpan out to be scattered by the wind. "The floor was kinda dirty, so I thought I'd clean up."

"Good idea," said Buffy, grabbing a broom.

"There's recently been a position left open in Sunnydale High School. It seems we need a teacher for the Anatomy/Physiology class."

"What a coincidence," Natalie said, smiling. "I'm a doctor. I've got the perfect qualifications to teach a class like that." (Who cares about pesky little things like teaching certificates? This is fanfic we're talking about here!) "But it's the middle of the year. How would I know where to start?"

"There's another coincidence," said Giles, getting up and helping Natalie to her feet. "I'm the school librarian. I can show you everything you need to know." Willow, Xander, and Buffy stared, not used to seeing Giles be anything but proper, upright, British, and kind of a cold fish around women.

"Well, that settles it," said Natalie, moving closer to Giles. "I think my future is in Sunnydale!" She headed for the elevator, Giles holding her arm, Buffy, Willow, and Xander--unintroduced to her still--trailing behind them, with only one thought in her mind.

//How the hell am I going to get this sword out of here with none of them noticing?//


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