Welcome to the H-Mouth | The Witch | Teacher's Pet
When She Was Bad | Some Assembly Required

Sounds made and donated by Valerie Meachum and Abby Albrecht.

Welcome to the H-Mouth

Jesse: "Is it me, or are you turning into a bibbling idiot?"

Cordelia: "Don't you have an elsewhere to be?" 16k

Buffy: "Isn't that bizarre? Aren't you just going 'Oooo'?" 32k

Buffy: "To make you a vampire, they have to suck your blood, and then you have to suck their blood. It's like a whole big sucking thing. Mostly, they're just gonna kill you." 88k

Giles: "Into each generation, a Slayer is born. One girl in all the world, a Chosen One, one born with the--"
Buffy: "-- strength and skill to hunt the vampires, to stop the spread of their evil blah, blah, blah." 112k

Giles: "A Slayer slays, a Watcher--"
Buffy: "--watches?"
Giles: "Yes... No." 76k

Giles: "Everything you've ever dreaded was under your bed, but told yourself couldn't be by the light of day -- they're all real!"
Buffy: "What, do you like, send away for the Time-Life series?" 180k

Buffy: "Prepares me for what? For getting kicked out of school? For losing all of my friends? For having to spend all of my time fighting for my life, and never getting to tell anyone because I might endanger them? Go ahead, prepare me." 156k

Joyce: "Will there be boys there?"
Buffy: "No, Mom, it's a nun's club." 44k

Angel: "You're standing at the Mouth of Hell... and it's about to open." 48k

Willow: "He stole my Barbie! Uh, we were five." 32k

Willow: "Well, when I'm with a boy I like, it's hard for me to say anything cool, or witty, or at all. I can usually make a few vowel sounds, then I have to go away." 124k

Cordelia: "God! What is your childhood trauma?!" 32k

Buffy: "I don't suppose you've got a key on you."
Angel: "They really don't like me dropping in."
Buffy: "Why not?"
Angel: "They really don't like me." 92k

Buffy: "Do you know what it's like to have a friend? ....That wasn't supposed to be a stumper." 84k

Angel: "Good luck." 12k

Buffy: "There's something you forgot about too: sunrise.... It's in about nine hours, moron." 196k

The Witch

Xander's crash and burn:

Xander: "For I am Xander, King of Cretins. May all lesser cretins bow before me." 48k

Buffy: "My buds are here! I love my buds!" 28k

Buffy: "That's 'cause you're my friend. You're my... Xander-shaped friend!" 48k

Buffy: "I don't... feel so good." 20k

Teacher's Pet

Xander's daydream guitar solo / Buffy: "You're drooling."

Buffy: "Destructo-Girl, that's me." 28k

When She Was Bad

Giles' intro

Willow: "My nose is cold."
Xander: "Here, let me get that for you."
Willow: "Xander!"
Xander: "Sorry. I can't help myself. Your nose looks so tasty." 162k

Willow: "I think we had the upper hand... In a subtle way..." 82k

Willow: "We got to wear robes." 23k

Cordelia: "Is it possible to have too much character?" 47k

Giles: "Finding any redeeming uhh... Naked?" 71k

Xander: "Yo G-man! What's up?"
Giles: "Nice to see you. And don't ever call me that." 105k

Xander: "Oh 8 minutes and 33 seconds, pay up. I called 10 minutes before you'd have to consult your books about something." 125k

Willow: "Tsch. Tell me about it. The other night I dreamt that Xander... Uhh... It wasn't Xander. It wasn't even me. It was a friend's dream. And she doesn't remember it." 253k

Xander: "If they hurt Willow, I'll kill you." 50k

Buffy: "Kick my ass." 52k

Cordelia: "Embrace the pain. Spank your inner moppet. Whatever." 80k

Giles: "Well then. I've killed you once. It shouldn't be too hard to do it again." 114k

Ms. Calendar: "Yeah. That's the worst part about being hung upside down by a vampire that wants to slit your throat. The stains..." 130k

Some Assembly Required

Angel: "Danced with is a pretty loose term. Mated with might be a little closer."

Cordelia: "Eww! Why is it that every conversation you guys have has the word corpse in it?" 98k

Xander: "Call me an optimist but I'm hoping to find a fortune in gold dubloons." 75k

Buffy: "Being called an idiot tends to take people out of the dating mood."
Xander: "It actually kinda turns me on."
Buffy: "I fear you." 161k

Xander: "People don't fall in love with whats right in front of them. People want the dream. What they can't have. The more unattainable, the more attractive." 193k

Buffy: "She's a techno pagan right? Ask her to bless your laptop." 88k

Giles: "I think it's odd that a nation that prides itself on its virility should feel compelled to strap on 40 pounds of protective gear in order to play rugby." 180k

Ms. Calendar: "Is this your normal strategy for a first date? Dissing my country's national pasttime?"
Giles: "Did you just say, date?"
Ms. Calendar: "You noticed that, huh?" 242k

Angel: "I saw the fire. I figured you'd be here." 57k

Xander: Whining about his lack of a date. 331k

Giles and Ms Calendar's 'second date conversation'. 435k

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This page last updated April 2, 2000.

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