Deep Blueby Puck and Zillah
Rating: NC-17 eventually.
Ainsley put another neatly folded sweater in the cardboard box and taped it up. She scanned her living room, covered in boxes, slowly being dismantled. She was going down to North Carolina to be a lawyer, on the fast track to seat on the bench. She smiled a little. Always on the fast track.
She found herself staring out the window. He'd be out to sea by now, surrounded by blue. She rested her forehead on the glass. He was sailing away and she was moving away. She wondered if she'd ever see him again.
* * *
"Does anyone else feel like a second semester senior? It's like we're so close to the end we don't care if we screw up."
"That's an interesting view point, Josh. Get to work."
Ainsley smiled as she walked into the bullpen. Two months left in the administration and people were restless.
Sam was coming out of his office. "Hi."
She smiled. "Hi. He's right, this place looks like it's closing out for the summer."
"Closing out for good."
"Yeah." She leaned on the doorjamb. "I'm already packed. Now all I have to do is worry about packing up my apartment."
"You want some help?"
She looked surprised, then smiled. "Sure."
"Is there anything I can do up here? I'm bored."
"Wanna help me pack?"
She shrugged. "Better then nothing."
"Right this way, then."
She followed him into his office, in disarray. "You're usually neater then this."
"It's possible to pack neat."
"You're not ready to leave, are you?"
He rubbed his eyes. "No."
She stood next to him, pressed against him. "Me neither."
He turned sliding his arms around her. She wrapped her arms around him, nuzzling at his shoulder.
"I'm trying not to think about it."
"Do you know what you're going to do?"
"Take some time off. Go sailing."
She smiled. "Neat."
"You starting right away?"
"Within a week, yeah."
"You should take some time."
"I get bored."
"You could come sailing."
She stiffened a little. "I don't know."
"You'd like it."
"It's not. . . this is a good job. And us on a boat together. . . "
He let her go. "No, you're right."
She felt colder suddenly. "Maybe. . . I want to see you when you come back."
She looked up at him. "So you still want help?"
She smiled softly and picked up some books, setting them in a box.
"It was a silly idea."
"I'm just not sure. . . what it would mean."
"And that would be bad?"
She looked down at the book she was holding. "Maybe."
He sighed. "Yeah."
She looked at him. "You're upset."
"I didn't mean to upset you. I just think that's a big step."
"You're right, don't worry about it."
She looked uncertain. "Okay."
"Really. Don't worry about it." He grinned a little. "I'll write and send you pictures to make you jealous."
"I'd like that."
He smiled and they packed in silence.
* * *
Ainsley put her briefcase down in her new, as yet unpacked living room. She wrinkled her nose at the bland walls, as she had every time she'd walked in since she'd moved here. She'd bought the blue paint for it weeks ago, but hadn't had enough free time to do it yet. She dropped her mail on the couch and went into the kitchen to get some cookies and a glass of wine. She put them on the coffee table, turned on CNN and went through her mail.
On the top of the pile was a rumpled letter postmarked from the Bahamas.
She picked it up, letting the others fall to her lap. She'd recognize that handwriting anywhere. She ran her thumb over the post mark, then turned it over to open it.
*Ainsley-- It's 82 degrees here. You can't even imagine how beautiful it is. It's nice to have some time alone, some quiet. But I do miss you.*
She ran her fingers over the words, reading it again and again. She pressed the paper against her chest and flopped back on the couch.
* * *
Ainsley trudged through her days, working at her boring little job and coming home to her boring little apartment. The only bright spots were the letters that periodically trickled in from Sam.
He told her about the islands, about the water, about the stars. About the people he met and the food he ate. Like he was trying to share every experience with her.
She kept every letter in a little cedar box her mother had given her years ago. She wished she could write him back but he was always moving. Sometimes she'd open up her atlas and find him, trying to figure out which route he'd take, where he'd be.
* * *
One day the wheels came off the wagon. She couldn't have said what it was. The work load was no heavier or more boring then it had been. The people were no more rude or insensitive. Maybe it was how blue the sky was. How spring had finally come to the South and she could wear a short sleeved blouse. Whatever it was, she walked into her boss's office and quit. She packed up her office and went back to her drab little apartment. She told the landlord she was going to be out by the end of the month, called a storage facility and rented a space and sat down to figure out where Sam was.
* * *
She just missed him. The men at the docks told her he'd left two days ago, heading south. She bought a few dresses, then took a charter to the next island.
His boat had been simple blue and white when he'd lived in DC. It was bright green now -- the islands had gotten to him -- which made it stand out in the marina but unrecognizable to her, and she walked past it twice before she saw "Miss Havisham" scrawled across the bow.
She grinned, stopping at his slip. She decided she liked the green better. It was obvious he wasn't on board so she made herself comfortable.
She saw him coming down the dock. He was very tan, in shorts and an unbuttoned, brightly colored shirt. The sun had threaded his hair with gold.
She stood, her overstuffed duffel bag at her feet. She wore one of the island dresses she'd bought at the last port, her hair unbound. She found herself grinned, waiting for him to notice her.
He stopped a few feet away, staring at her. "Ainsley?"
She waved a little. "Hi."
"What are you doing here?"
"I quit my job, broke my lease and put all my things in storage. . . So I hope that offer of sailing with you is still open."
He grinned. "It is." He came closer, wrapping his arms around her in a hug. "It's good to see you."
She leaned into him. "It's good to see you, too. You're very tan."
"I've gotten a lot of sun."
She touched the blonde streaks in his hair. "I can tell."
"I hope you brought lots of sunscreen."
"I did. But don't worry. I tan easy."
She could see it in his eyes he almost kissed her. But he pulled back and hopped onto the boat. He held out a hand to her to help her up. She tossed him her bag, then hopped onto he boat with him. She closed her eyes as a breeze stirred her hair. "It smells so clean."
"Wait until the fishing boats come in," he said with a laugh.
She smiled at him. "Where are we going next?"
"I don't know. Anywhere you want."
She went to the far side of the boat and looked at the water. "Are there any non populated islands anymore? You know, ones you can go to and not see anyone and lay naked on the beach. Or are they all owned by movie stars?"
He stared at her dumbly.
She looked over and he could see she was blushing. "The naked thing was going too far, wasn't it?"
"I'm not complaining."
She smiled. "What's the longest we can stay out on the water?"
"Let's do that. I feel. . . like being lost for a while."
"All right," he said softly.
She came towards him. "Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Just sit back and relax."
She found a seat on the deck and tipped her head back to the sun, smiling faintly.
He pulled up the lines from the dock and got them moving.
* * *
Ainsley loved living on the boat. He showed her how to do a few things so she didn't feel completely useless, but mainly she lay on the deck and sunned. Her hair had lightened to almost white and her skin had a healthy tan. Her wardrobe consisted of bathing suits and sun dresses. "I'm never going back," she told him.
"You and me both."
"I'm serious, I could do this the rest of my life. I have savings."
"What about your career?"
"I think I'd prefer to be a beach bum."
"I'm writing a book."
"I always knew you would."
"It could use a second eye."
She smiled. "I was just thinking I was out of books to read."
"Can I ask you something?"
"Why did you come here?"
"I was jealous."
"I was working ten hour days, living in a barren little apartment. And I would get your letters about the water and the islands. And I was jealous. That you'd had the courage to just take a chance and do what you'd always wanted to do. I've never done that. I've always done what was expected." She looked out at the water. "One day, right after the weather turned, I looked out the window of my office and realized this wasn't what I wanted to do with the next forty years. So I quit." She looked at him. "I took a chance."
He grinned. "I'm very glad you did."
He dropped the anchor. "I'm going to go for a swim."
"Mmm, sounds good."
He stripped off his shirt and shoes and dove over the side.
She kneeled on the deck, arms crossed on the railing, watching him swim.
He rolled onto his back. "Wanna come in?"
"Yeah," she said softly. She untied the top of her dress and let it fall. She climbed on the rail and jumped into the water.
Sam almost forgot how to swim.
She surfaced, water lapping at the tops of her breasts. She grinned at the expression on his face.
"You. . .uh. . ."
"I'm feeling very free."
"I'm feeling very. . . er, I shouldn't say that."
She laughed and dove under the water again, heading straight down. She was under there a couple of minutes before surfacing again, flipping her hair off her face.
He was still staring, mesmerized.
She swam towards him, treading water a foot or so away. "Blink, Sam."
"Now I can't even breathe."
She swam a little closer and kissed him.
He groaned, arms coming around her. They sank under the water.
She kissed him until she couldn't breathe, then released him, kicking to the surface.
He came up with her. "Ainsley. . ."
She took a breath. "This might be dangerous in the water."
"I've wanted you for so long."
She smiled and put her arms around his neck, scissoring his legs slowly to keep her afloat. "Me too."
"Come on." He swam over to the ladder at the back of the boat.
She followed, going first up the metal ladder, water running down her body. He stepped back, just appreciating the view.
She climbed into the boat, grabbing a towel to dry off with.
He didn't wait for her to dry off, he came forward and kissed him again.
She dropped the towel, wrapping her arms around him.
He kissed her deeply, sliding his hands over her body. She moaned, deepening the kiss so that it was almost rough. He eased her down towards the deck.
She thrust her hands into the waistband of his shorts, pushing them down.
He groaned, cupping her breasts.
She hooked her legs over his, kissing him hard. She arched into him, hips grinding into him. "Jesus," he gasped, and they hadn't even really started yet.
She looked up at him, breathing hard. Her fingers wove through his hair, causing it to shed droplets on her face. She smiled and kissed him again, pressing herself to him. He kissed her mouth, sliding his hand between her legs.
She gasped, bucking into his touch. "Yes," she muttered.
He stroked his fingertips over her clit. She moaned, head tipping back against the deck. He kissed down her throat, sliding his fingers inside her.
"God, Sam," she whispered. She arched into him, urging him on. She dug her hand into his hair, kissing him again.
He lifted his head and watched the expression on her face. Her eyes closed as she tipped her head back again, obviously lost in her pleasure. She rocked gently with the motion of his hand. He dipped his head again, kissing her breasts.
She gasped, bucking a little. He felt her start to quiver around his fingers. He sucked her nipple into his mouth and bit down. She let out a scream that echoed across the ocean and came, spasming. He kissed her mouth gently.
She smiled, hand slipping between them to cradle his shaft.
"Ainsley," he hissed.
"I want you," she whispered, stroking.
"I've seen your pills."
"I've been taking them."
"Good." He lifted her hips and slid into her.
She moaned softly, wrapping her arms around him. He moved slowly, lifting her leg around him. She smiled, looking up at him, holding him close as they moved together. His breath rasped in her ear, and he sucked her lobe into his mouth.
"God," she breathed.
He moved faster, kissing her mouth in time. He felt her nails start to dig into his shoulder. Her hips were bucking out of rhythm now as she reached for her climax.
"Are you. . "
"Close," she whimpered.
He gritted his teeth and pushed deeper. She let out a little cry and came, clenching around him, shaking. He almost growled as he let go and came with her.
She held his tight, face buried in his shoulder, trembling.
"Wow," he whispered.
"Yeah," she agreed.
"That was. . ."
"Words are failing me."
He rolled off of her, laying out on his back.
She snuggled into his side. "That was exciting."
"We should do it more."
"I'm for that."
"I didn't want you to think I expected this, just because. . ."
"I was the one who threw herself at you naked."
"I mean before that."
"I know you had no ulterior motives."
"Not that I'm not glad. . ."
"It's okay, Sam."
He smiled. "Okay."
She stretched, arching like a cat. She pillowed her head on his shoulder. "Now, let's be quiet and enjoy the sunshine."
"I should find my shorts."
"I would imagine you don't want that sunburned.
He sat up, and scanned the deck. "Uh, Ainsley?"
"Where did you throw my bathing suit?"
She lifted her head, then sat up. She crawled to the rail and peered over it. He heard her giggling. He came up behind her. There was a splotch of bright yellow floating on the blue about a dozen yards out. She looked at him. "Want me to go get them?"
He sighed. "I'll go."
"That's okay. It's my fault." She arched a brow. "Unless you'd like to race."
"No. One of us should stay with the boat. I'll be right back." He dove over the side.
She watched him a moment, then found her sun dress and pulled it back on.
He was wearing them when he climbed back on board. "Sorry about that."
"I don't mind a bit."
He kissed her nose. "You've got freckles, you know."
She smiled. "I know."
"What do you say we put to port and get a real dinner?"
"I'd like to take you some place nice. Maybe even spend a night in a hotel."
She grinned. "And I was so looking forward to negotiating the bunk."
"There will be plenty of time for that."
"I'll have to pick a nice dress."
"Did you bring one? Or do you need to shop?"
She thought a minute, doing a mental inventory of her bag. "I think I may have to shop."
He was working on the lines to get them turned around. "I may have to watch."
"I always appreciate a second opinion."
He stopped to kiss her again, and then he got distracted by it.
"Sam," she murmured after an eternity. "The lines."
"They can wait."
She kept kissing. "I leave that up to the captain."
"You're the first mate now."
"Aye, aye, skipper."
Finally he pulled back. "Dinner."
"And then more sex."
"Let's find a waterbed. I've always wanted to try one of those."
"I'm not sure there are many cheap motels on St. Croix."
"Maybe a honeymoon suite or something."
"I appreciate that."
He disentangled himself and went to deal with the boat. She took her usual seat on the deck and watched.
They pulled into port four hours later.
She dug her wallet out of her bag and they climbed off. "We need to find the shopping district."
"We'll have to find someone who speaks English."
"What do they speak here?"
"I speak a bit."
"Good luck, then. I speak Spanish."
"We'll give it a try."
He kissed her brow and slid his hand into hers.
2 months later
Ainsley sat on the deck, reading the hundredth romance novel of the month and watching Sam work on his book. She looked up at the sky, the water, peered at the horizon to make out the shore. When she looked back at Sam he was looking at her. She smiled a little. "Hi."
He smiled. "Hey."
She paused a moment, looking at his notebook. "You ever think about going back to land?"
"Sometimes. Do you?"
"Yeah," she said softly.
"You've got to be bored out here."
"A little. Don't get me wrong, I've enjoyed it. It's been good for me, given me time to think about what I want to do."
"What do you want to do?"
"I think I'd like to be a children's advocate."
"Yeah. I've been thinking about how much I miss feeling like I made a difference in the world. In people's lives. But I don't have the strength for politics."
"I like that."
She smiled. "I think I'd feel like making a difference."
He kissed her. "I'll support whatever you choose."
She leaned into him. "Thank you."
"Having a regular, real bed would be nice."
"Yeah." She smiled. "We can get a little house somewhere on the ocean."
"With a boat slip."
"With a big back porch we can hang a swing on."
He touched her hand. "One house. For the both of us."
She wove her fingers with his. "Yes."
He leaned forward and captured her mouth.
She sank into his arms kissing him deeply. After a while she lifted her head. "So, are we heading back for civilization?"
"I'll turn us around."
She grinned. "Think they'll even recognize us?"
"I certainly don't feel like the same person."
"I haven't in quite some time."
"Let's give ourselves new names."
He laughed. "Got any ideas?"
"I like it."
"Thank you. How about Raul for you?"
"Raul and Nikita."
"I like it. We could fight crime in our spare time."
He laughed out loud. "I love you."
She looked surprised, then smiled softly. "I love you, too."
He climbed up, and turned the boat around.
* * *
They found a little Cape Cod on Nantucket, right on the water with a path down to their own boat slip where a still green Miss. Havishem lived. They had a huge back porch where they'd installed a porch swing. Ainsley found a job with a children's advocacy group in Boston. She took the ferry every morning, leaving Sam in his study. She spent all day trying to save the world and came back to find him still hunched over his computer, trying to think of another world for tumescent.
She held out a cup of coffee. "Here. You need to look at something else."
She sat in his lap. "Do we have the perfect life?"
"Sometimes I think so."
"How's it coming?"
"I went word hunting."
"Was it dangerous?"
"Slightly. CJ was annoyed, but helpful."
"I need to get you a thesaurus."
"I have one. I don't like it."
She stroked her fingers through his hair. "Is there anything you would add to our perfect life?"
He was quiet for a long moment. "If you were my wife."
She rested her forehead on his. "And Nikita Jr."
"That would be nice, too."
"Let's do it."
He grinned. "Get married?"
"And have a baby."
He kissed her ear. "We can start tonight."
"Let's do it on the boat."
"Conceiving the baby on the boat. That's fitting."
"We owe that boat a lot."
"There's only one problem."
"It's March and we're in Massachusetts."
"We won't take it out. We'll go, have sex on the bunk and come back inside."
"Okay, but it'll be freezing."
"Sounds exciting." She hopped off his lap.
He stood. "You are serious."
"Is it even going to work tonight?"
"There's always a possibility."
"Didn't you take your pill this morning?"
"I was in a hurry this morning and you were engrossed. Figured you wouldn't mind skipping a day. And I intended on having this conversation."
He grinned. "Okay."
"I'll meet you in the foyer." She ran off to get some thick blankets to put on the bunk.
He saved his work and shut down his computer.
They jogged out to the boat. She made the bed with quilts and blankets, then turned to him. He kissed her gently. She sighed, wrapping her arms around his neck. He lifted her up and set her down on the bed.
They shed their clothes and burrowed under the warm covers. He ran his hands over her body, pulling her close. She snuggled against him, linking a leg over his. She kissed his mouth deeply. He cupped her rear, pulling her against him.
She shifted and slid him inside her, making a quite noise. He sucked in a breath. She pillowed her head in the hollow of his shoulder, moving her hips back and forth. He lifted her leg, pulling it high over his hip.
They moved so she was on top of him, making it easier for her to move. He groaned, pushing up to her. She kissed him deeply, pushing harder.
"Ainsley," he hissed.
She dug her fingers into his skin, increasing her pace. He reached between them and stroked her clit. She moaned and he felt her start to tremble around him. She whispered his name as she came, bucking against him.
He gasped, finally letting go.
She shuddered as she felt the heat of him spread inside her, murmuring to him.
He sighed, rubbing her back.
"This was nice."
"Give me a break, little words."
He kissed her hair. "Sorry."
"I love you, too."
"I can't wait to get married."
"Can we go back inside, I'm cold?"
"Me too, let's go."
He climbed out of the bunk, shivering as he dressed. She tossed on her clothes and gathered the blankets, then they ran back to the house.