Girls Night Gone Wild

by Puck and Zillah

Rating: NC-17 Is it? It is. A PWP!
Disclaimer: Not ours, just messing with 'em.
Spoilers: Not much. This follows our story Sex in the District.

Ainsley put out the last bowl of chips as the doorbell rang. She hurried to answer it. On the other side were Donna, Margaret, Carol, and Ginger. She grinned. "Get the tapes?"

Donna held up a bag. "Three of 'em."

"CJ's coming soon, she got hung up."

"No problem, we can order the pizza while we wait." They all filed into the living room, taking seats. Ainsley took orders and ordered the pizza. CJ came with the pies.

CJ helped Ainsley carry the pizza in. "I'll have you know the boys are all still at the office."

"And we feel pity for them."

Donna leapt up. "Where's the alcohol?"

"In the kitchen. There's some in the cupboard above the sink and more in the fridge."

Donna hauled beers and other sundry drinks out into the livingroom. CJ grabbed a beer and sunk onto the couch. "You'd be amazed how long it's been since I've actually had female social company."

"You are welcome here," Ainsley told her, mixing a pink squirrel.

"Even though you're my boss," Carol added.

"We're forgetting that for today."

"What do you think the men do for fun?" Ainsley asked, shaking a cocktail shaker and pouring opaque pink liquid into a martini glass.

Margaret took a beer. "I'm not sure Leo remembers about fun."

"Leo is very anti-fun," Carol agreed.

Donna went over to the VCR. "Okay, I'm putting a tape on." She paused. "Ainsley. . .is this a black box?"

"Yes. I need my CMT."

She turned the TV on and began flicking channels. "So you get, like, everything?"

"Pretty much, yeah. Comes in handy on those late nights. You'd be amazed what's on cable at night." As she finished speaking Donna stopped flipping, landing on Spice, where two half naked people were rolling around on a beach. Ainsley smirked. "Like that."

CJ pointed her beer bottle at the screen. "See now, in those things they never tell you how uncomfortable sex on the beach can be."

"Because they care deeply for reality," Ginger muttered.

"I would think sand would get places no sand should be," Ainsley said thoughtfully.

"It does."

Donna sat down on the couch. "Okay, this is really entertaining."

They looked at her, then back at the TV. "It's sad. We're living vicariously through porn stars."

The credits began to roll on screen. Ginger reached for the movie and Donna smacked her hand away. "Uh uh. I wanna see what's in next."

Margaret put a hand to her head. "An unattractive man and a woman with fake boobs have sex."

A school room set came on the screen. A man who hadn't been in school in ten years was sitting at a desk, being scolded by a teacher. She was blonde, in a conservative suit that Ainsley might have owned. Her blonde hair was pined up in a bun. She ordered the man to come up to her desk and drop his pants. Then she pulled out a ruler.

"Twelve seconds to full frontal nudity," Donna said, looking at her watch.

"At least it pretended to have a plot," Carol said, sipping a beer.

"How come the men in these are never well endowed?" Ainsley asked.

On cue the six of them tilted their heads sideways to study the guy on screen. "It's not *bad*."

"But she's right, he's really only average."

"Well endowed men don't need to be paid to get women."

"She's not a whore, she's a teacher. See?" Ginger pointed. The actress was taking off her blouse, and Donna called out, "One minute, eight seconds to boob shot."

"That is the fakest set of breasts I have ever seen," Ainsley said, gaping.

"Women in pornos are always well endowed."

"You'd think there'd be a way to make silicon look natural."

"I think that's the point. Some men go for the fake look."

"You can't blame them. This stuff's a jerk off fantasy. Anyone here ever bought a four-inch, half limp dildo?"

They laughed. "I have a Gecko," Ainsley said, getting up for another drink.

"I've seen those! Does it work?"

She grinned. "Better then all but one of my lovers."

That got her a chorus of groans and rolled eyes.

"I didn't even say which one," she called from the kitchen.

There was silence. "Really?" Donna called.

She poked her head around the corner. "Oh yeah." She sauntered back, a bottled mudslide in her hand. "He could put these guys to shame." She sat on the couch again just as the man on the screen press the woman onto the desk and buried his face between her legs.

"You are talking about Sam, right?"

"I certainly am."

"Can we roll our eyes now?"

"You're all just jealous."

On the screen the camera was in a close up on the woman. She was making ridiculous faces in mock pleasure.

"You think we really look like that?"

"I think we look more ridiculous."

"I for one, have never pursed my lips and pouted during orgasm."

"Do you watch in the mirror?"

"I just know. I'm never that cute."

The man climbed onto the desk, and Donna immediately said, "And just six minutes to sex."

"Wait, it's time to count the orgasms."

Two hours later, they were still watching the Spice Channel, falling over each other with laughter. They had also made a serious dent in Ainsley's liquor supply and were scouring the phone book for a liquor store that delivered when the doorbell rang. Ainsley bounced to her feet. "Maybe it's the alcohol fairy."

Nope. Just Sam.

She frowned a moment, then grinned. "You'll do." She pulled him in. "Girls, it's Sam!"

"Hi, Sam," they chorused.

"What are you doing here, sugar?"

"I came to. . .what the hell are you watching?"

The women giggled. Ainsley took his hand and pulled him so he could see the TV.

"I thought. . .CJ said something about chick movies."

"We found this more interesting. Don't you think so?"

"Um. . .uh. . ."

She slid her arms around his neck. "Would you like to watch with us, Samuel?"

Donna got up. "Actually, I think it's about time to head home. Don't you guys think?"

There was a chorus of yes's and a few calls to the cab company. In twenty minutes Ainsley was alone with Sam. On the TV two men in pseudo period wear were screwing a tavern wench six ways to Sunday. Ainsley sprawled onto the couch. "Have you ever had one of those?"

"One of what?"

"Three some."

"No," he said, his voice a little high.

She made a little surprised noise, looking at the movie again, then back at him. "Why did you come over? I thought you were going to work late."

Sam shrugged. "Toby left, and there was no use in working on the speech alone."

"I see. Well, I'm glad you're here."

"I thought you were doing girlie movies?"

"We were." She pointed to the bag the girls had brought in. "But Donna started flipping through the channels on my box and we found this and decided it would be more entertaining. Which it was."

"So you. . .sat around watching porn?"

"Yes. For two hours. I'm very horny."

Sam shifted his eyes from the TV to her. "You didn't have some big lesbian orgy, did you?"

"No. But were drinking heavily. If you hadn't come who knows what could have happened."

He swallowed. "Ummm."

She sat up, kneeling on the couch. "Sam? Do you think I'm a blonde republican sex kitten?"

"Right now you are."

She smiled, taking his hand. "Feel like helping me make our own porno?"

"Do you mean that metaphorically or is there a video camera somewhere."

She paused, then her eyes lit up. "I do have a camera."

"With our luck it would end up on the news."

She pouted. "Metaphorically, then, I guess."

The people on screen were moaning and groaning, and it distracted Sam for a moment. She took the opportunity to lean over and begin unbuttoning his shirt. He shifted his eyes down to watch her small hands move against the white fabric.

She got the last button and pushed it off his shoulders, then pulled his undershirt off too. "You're much more attractive then the men in the movies."

"Why thank you."

"You're hung better, too."

His head swiveled, giving her his full attention. "What?"

"Your penis is bigger then most porn stars."

"Should I say thank you now?"

"It wasn't a compliment. . . well it was. But it's also a fact." She pulled her shirt off. She was naked beneath it. He noticed her nipples were already hard. "My boobs, however, are much smaller."

He touched one with his fingertips. "They're prefect. They're real."

"See, that's what they don't understand. Men like little breasts too. You're a tiny breast man, aren't you?"

He kissed one tip. "Like the Venus DeMilo."

"Thank you."

"Perfect. . ."

"What do you like? Butts?"

He kissed his way to her other breast. "I like every inch of you."

"Good answer."

"These are some of my favorite inches."

"I'm glad of that." She kissed the top of his head. "Come on the couch?"

He lifted his head and captured her mouth instead. She moaned into his mouth, wrapping her arms around his neck. He ran his hands down her back and under the waistband of her pants.

She wasn't wearing any panties either.

He groaned. "You planned this."

"It's just more comfortable. Though I was hoping you'd be dropping by."

His hands slid around the front and quickly undid the buttons. She stood on the couch to take them off, then stepped forward, jumping on him, so her legs were around his waist. He stumbled back, swinging her around and setting her down on her table.

She grinned widely at him, dropping a kiss on his collarbone.

There was weird porn music playing in the background from the TV. She giggled softly. "This is a bit bizarre."

He slid his palms along her inner thighs. "Should I turn it off?"

"No. It's kinda fun. We can compete with them."

He grinned, and then he slid down to his knees. She sighed softly, legs falling open. He kissed his way slowly up from her knee. She made a humming noise of pleasure. He reached her center, kissing her there, too. She gasped, arching into him. He teased her until she began rocking her hips, pushing against his mouth.

She liked it when he did this. He was very good. She hooked her legs over his shoulders, holding herself against him. Just at her edge, he stopped, and stood slowly.

She whimpered but smiled at him. "Has anyone ever told you you're a cunning linguist?"


"You are," she drawled.

He kissed her mouth. "Not going for cute right now."

She shuddered. "Not cute. Cunning."

He groaned. "Ainsley."

She sucked on his lower lip. He pulled her hips to the edge of the table and pushed into her. She squealed, gripping his shoulders hard.

"Still cute?"

"Way beyond cute."

He thrust harder. "Good."

She whimpered, hanging onto him tightly. Her eyes closed and she tipped her head back on the table.

"God, I love watching you," he hissed.

"Do I look silly?" she whispered, arching up to him.

"You look amazing."

She smiled, digging her hand into his hair. She moved with him, growing tighter, body starting to tremble.

"Nothing's sexier than seeing you come."

She whimpered, bucking up sharply. He felt her start to clench just as a keening sound started in her throat.

"Yeah," he gasped, and then he slammed into her one last time. She hung onto him, wrapping him in her arms.

He kissed her shoulder, sucking in harsh breaths.

"That was good," she whispered.

"Yes, it was."

"Porn worthy." He grinned and rested his head on her shoulder, closing his eyes.

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