Please Do Not Feed or Tease the Newbies

by havocthecat
Copyright 1998

Er--I *guess* it's fic. I think. Or it's just silly.

"Please do not feed or tease the newbies," Xander said, peering up at the sign. "What the heck's that supposed to mean? I don't get any food?"

"Xander, you'll get food," said Buffy, rolling her eyes. "Don't worry. I think that someone put that up as a joke."

"Yeah, man," said Oz. "They put up the same sign when I started here. They're pretty cool about it, though."

"They put up the same sign when I started here," Xander said mockingly.

Cordelia hit him. "Twerp." "Ow!" Xander rubbed his arm. "What'd I do?"

"You were being a guy," said Cordelia. "Now shut up and be nice."

"Good luck," said Buffy. "Xander and nice, where food are concerned, just don't happen."

"So what are we here for anyway?" asked Cordelia.

"I don't know." Buffy lowered her sunglasses and looked over the rims at the room. "Giles decided to send us here after that little goof up with his hard drive."

"You mean that time you erased everything on it and we couldn't find the information we needed until it was almost too late?" Willow popped out from behind the door.

"Jeez, Will!" Xander jumped back. "Don't scare me like that!"

Willow smirked and walked away.

"Hello, everyone," said a very not-dead Ms. Calendar. "You've all been signed up for the intensive computer course. Willow and Oz will be assisting me today."

"Intensive?" Buffy winced.

"Computer?" Cordelia's jaw dropped.

"Course?" Xander sagged against the wall. "Aw, man, and it's a Saturday!"

"You'll have an entire weekend of computer lessons, and by the time you're done, you'll be an expert."

"Or we'll have a few dead bodies," muttered Buffy.

"Help," squeaked Cordelia.

"Man, where's an Internet demon when you need one?" Xander looked around. Nope, no giant robots to conveniently interrupt them. "All I can say is that there better be food."

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