SunS Quote List -- February-April, 1998

"'Tis _always_ better to a a live whatever than a dead whatever." -- Mama Mo

"I didn't even realize I was committing quote - _I_ thought I was being deeply philosophical." -- Maureen

"By all accounts Joss is *very* happy with how things have gone.... which means we'll be mewling mounds of mush by the end of May." -- Mary Beth

"But you know we're in Rerun Hell when you go into the Bronze and people, including the VIP, are talking *weather*..." -- Valerie

"I still believe that Bill Gates plans on taking over the world by confusing us to death. If everyone spends their time trying to find Solitaire they won't notice he's usurped the presidency." -- Abby

"And, Joss being Joss and all other things being equal..." -- Valerie

"Can I sleepover at someone's place so i don't have to be alone with my brain tonight?" -- Dianne

"Um... once my eyes stop bleeding, I'll get back to you..." -- Dianne

"Neener, neener! Welcome to the old-folks club. ;-)"
"Speaks She Who Suffered From Wooly Mammoth Allergies... :-p"
"< pptthhhhhh! > I keep telling ya, it was the *sabertooth tigers* I was allergic to... sheesh!" -- Maureen and Dianne

"Goddess above, we *are* bored today! :-/ (Do you think if we all wrote to Joss and told him how this once-proud Buffy list has been reduced to chatting about childhood diseases never even suggested on the show he would take pity and give us new eps??? < sigh > No, this is Joss. He'd just give Willow swamp fever or swine flu or something...)" -- Dianne

"Oh, *really* bite me!!!!!!!!! THTPTPTPTPTPTPT! Isn't torture by butterfly illegal?" --Perri

"Worst of all, however, is the Marygoddamnsue. If I see even one more moronic story wherein the beautiful, sensitive, psychic, pagan, soprano watercolour artist computer genius sex kitten heroine... seduces Angel..., thereby curing him by the Magic Healing Power of Sex. Or, at least, Love.... That gagging sound? Yes, that would be me." --Elaine

"Caveat emptor (that's Latin for "an empty can of caviar" -- goodbye, salty goodness?)" -- Betsy

"Nooooo! It's such a nice wheelchair! It has arm rests and *real* footrests... Tie him to Giles's car and push that off the cliff. Don't hurt the pretty wheelchair."
"Hey! I *like* that car."
"Hell, just _throw_ him off the cliff! That way we can keep the nice wheelchair *and* the car, and we get to watch him thrash about in the air all the way down... *plop!* It should just hurt him a _little_. Right?" -- Abby, Betsy and Maureen on how to kill Spike

""Hey, Angel, you say you're a vampire, right? Let's see how well you do the Cheesy Nick Knight Flying Over Toronto scene!" (bentley throws Angelus over the cliff. Wheeeeeeeeeee!!!!!! He looks even sillier than Ger did!)
< THUD >
< bounce >
< thud >
(he splats better, though)" -- Betsy

"I mean, geez, don't Buffy & Co. ever become mortal enemies with and/or particularly chummy with a staff member other than Giles? (A normal one, I mean, not a virgin-eating bug.)" --Gina

"Your own characters always mock you. They're like children." --Lizbet "Great... Now I have to add "steel myself for much angst and stress" to my things to do before summer. Thanks." -- Mary Beth

"Harbinger-free... that's how I want the rest of my weekend to go. 'kay?" -- MaryBeth

"Well we could be our very own Net Family Robinson! Lost in CyberSpace. I think if a large majority of us got together and tried to navigate ourselves somewhere, we'd end up hopelessly confused and lost... no problem."
"Actually, that sounds like the Natpack in Toronto. Or Chicago. Or San Francisco. Or..." -- MaryBeth and Betsy

"Well, we already named the mouse "twit" in your (his) honor... < g >"
"Whose mouse? Or do you have an actual mouse with long tail and twitchy whiskers? Anyway, you can still call him twit even though he's being nice for now...because I'm sure, owing to the presence of the y chromosome, that twitlike behavior will resurface. " -- Lizbet and Gina

"I could make a lot of money if I could invent a Jerk quotient machine--kinda like a breathalyzer--that would help you analyze if some particular guy's jerky behavior is just random guyness that is to be expected if one insists on dating heterosexual males, or signs of true Jerk status, indicating "Run away now--*fast*." Of course, then I'd be rich so I'd *really* need the machine because I'd have tons of jerks coming after me..." -- Gina

"And I do not throw temper tantrums. I get constructively and occasionally destructively pissed off. Difference." -- Perri

"I then thought of Dianne running around dressed like a leprechaun, cursing people with bad luck because they were bouncing, and thought I'd share this image with everyone." -- Tina

"And here comes Dianne, dribbling Tina down the hallway..." -- Maureen

"Oh my god. Part one airs before MediaWest, part two airs after. Does Joss know that he's doing this to MediaWest people? Does he know what kind of hell he's going to put us through? Does the man know how many fen are going to attempt to charter a flight from Lansing to California to hurt him?" -- Tina

"I should do one to Sarah McL's "Ice Cream.""
"..which has to be the most depressing happy song I've ever heard..."
"C'mon. For Sarah, it's positively peppy! Although severely misguided. Better than ice cream, yes. Better than chocolate?!?!?!?!?!?!????????" -- Celli and Lizbet

"Courting danger is *fun*! :):):)"
"But full-body traction kinda itches a little..." -- Celli and Lizbet

"I have decided I do, in fact, need to get a real life; I'm being way too traumatized by my virtual life." -- Perri

"Oookay. Do we really want to know what he was doing with the pie? And do we really want to hear the GASPers fantasizing about how to clean up the mess?"
"Thank you, Perri, for completely trashing my concentration. I *was* doing just fine, smiling about how silly those boys are, and *now* I'm going to have to spend an hour taking a cold shower. I really must think of how to return the favour. " -- Perri and Elaine on ASH, Nick and the pie

"then again, I figure building on this should be no problem at all for an Amazon who's fond of wearing vampire chinchillas on her head, or anyone who knows her of course..." -- Jennie

"My mother found an article on how Buffyisms are invading teen language. Hearing your mother say "yadda yadda yadda" is worthy of a wig point or two..." -- Lizbet

"Ever feel like a Christian slave in the arena with this show?" -- Kiki

"See, see, didn't I tell you she was evil? I said,'She's evil!' I did, I did." --Mo

"Tina, sweetie, if two years of every Natpacker I see drooling after me like I was the friggin' _Holy Grail_ hasn't made a dent, I don't think that's a very fair thing to expect of Leslie, now is it?" -- Dianne

"Once again... start a Round Robin, end up with a naked Angel. < shakes head > "SunS! The Buffy list of the gutter!"
"I almost wrote "Giles" instead of Angel. But I thought Leslie might appreciate the Angel image better. Either that, or she'd kill me." -- Dianne and Betsy

"Yeah, but it amuses me. "Yo! Jennie!" < holds big shiny plate over head, watches Jenny go glassy-eyed > See? It's 'Stupid Natpacker Tricks'!" -- Dianne

"Goddess help *me*! This is all about _me_! Me, me, me! :-p"
"*beam* No, actually, it's about torture. But that's ok, we can pretend." -- Dianne and Tina

"Nah, I'm bored... go ahead and misbehave... :)"
"You actually said that? On *this* list? < g >"
"Like it would make any difference, you little delinquents!"
"*beam* It's only because we love you, Dianne."
"< matronly sigh > You kids are gonna 'love' me into an early grave, y'know that?"
"Isn't that the point? Wait...shoot...I wasn't supposed to tell you..." -- Dianne and Tina

"Now besides the fact that Angel romping about anywhere pretty much boggles...." -- Mary Beth

"We all have our weirdness. :-p"
"Ours is called "Dianne." " -- Dianne and Betsy

"Remind me to kill you messily when we get to MediaWest, huh?"
"Note to self: remind Dianne to kill m--hey!" -- Dianne and Betsy

"Tri rudai faoin ol; e ol, e iompar agus e ioc."
"Maureen fell asleep at the keyboard again, I see. As long as she doesn't wake up with "Don't warn the tadpoles"..." -- Maureen and Betsy the Gaelicly impaired

"Uh, Dru would be a tie rack. She spins and spins and doesn't make a lot of sense." -- Abby

"But if for some bizarre reason I feel the sudden burning urge to see naked female breasts, I'll just take off my shirt, thank you anyway..." -- Dianne

"If anyone out there was born before 1956, tell me first. I could probably make it worth your while to not let Maureen know about you. (We wouldn't Maureen to lose her title of Ancient One, would we?) < evil grin >" -- Betsy

"Don't wanna breathe. < pout > Having fun turning blue. 'Sides, if I suffocate, she can't make me write. :P:P" -- Perri

"It's almost Wednesday! Hump day! Why is it called hump day when most people have sex on the weekend?" -- Abby

"The suspense is killing me. Over a month still to go. I'm not a well woman."
"Wake me when that's news, OK?" -- Gina and Lizbet

"I'll see that icky ooky yucky GACK, and raise you a fair wiggins." --Sheryl

"Well, just as long as we've managed to practice our multiculturalism *while* we're slinging profanity back and forth across the 'net..." -- Dianne

Roomie War III

"And it's really cool! At... looks really cool in the store... and the picture in the circular is pretty."
"Yeah, even with the drool spots all over it."
"No drool spots!! It is kinda wrinkled though. I'm thinking of framing it and putting it in The Place Where the Computer Will Go. Eventually."
"Ha! Don't let her fool you--there's a shrine set up to it on the desk already. Nearly burned the apartment down with those candles, she did!" -- Mary Beth and Beth on MB's (almost) new computer

"Just wait. It's a blast. Alternating between pillow fights and vidfests... and threatening each other's pets. (majorly kidding. Well, we do threaten... but only with the best intentions....)"
"Yeah, uh-huh... I just know one day I'm going to come home and hear "meowTHUNKmeTHUNKowwwwwwTHUNKmeeeeeeeeoTHUNKoowwww" and run to the dryer to find the cat in the air dry cycle..." -- Mary Beth and Beth

"::Glare:: *taptaptap* >>ponder<< She gets irritated if I pick on her. She get's irritated if I don't. ::MB flops down in a nearby chair and props her feet up on a table:: Someone else try. I'm tapped."
"*pumps fist* Yes!! My work here is done." -- Mary Beth and Beth, Roomie War III!

"Hey! Put the dog down. AND the razor, too. He's a short hair dog, he doesn't need to be a shorter hair dog...." --Mary Beth

"Stay tuned? The outcome is already decided. I'm bigger than you, and have a penchant for violence and a fascination with serial killers. Who's going to win? < g >"
"Ah but this is a virtual phsyical War where size doesn't matter. Could go on for.... (how long 'til the next new episode?)."
"A looooooong time. And as for virtual wars - I break your fingers, you can't type. Then I win." -- Mary Beth, Beth

"Yeah, but it's the train-wreck principle. Just 'cuz we know it's all gonna end in a bloody, gory mess doesn't mean we aren't going to bring popcorn!" -- Dianne

"She's assuming she'll actually be able to get her modem-hands on the phone line. < g >"
"And *she's* assuming that I (who pay all the bills and have all accounts in my name) won't find a way to have the phone jack in *her* room disconnected. ::bats eyes::smiles sweetly::"
"No, I know that you won't because you wouldn't even want to dream about what I'd be like if you tried to take away my phone/internet connection."
"Have we discussed the death wish I have yet? Now would be a good time to mention that? Where'd I put that phone number for Bell Atlantic...."
"I don't need a phone number. I can disconnect your phone line with a screwdriver. Or a sledgehammer..."
"Ah so... I disconnect your phone line... you "disconnect" my phone line... and we sit staring at each other every night whining about how we can't get online. ::blink::blink:: Surely we can come up with a better solution??" -- Beth and Mary Beth

"Now, Beth. We've talked about these violence is-hues."
"Yes, and it made no difference whatsover. *thwap*"
"OW! *sigh* Fine. I swat you with my dirty sock!! *thwap*"
"That was *my* dirty sock, you twit!" -- Mary Beth and Beth

"You can fool all of the people some of the time... and the roomie, like, none of the time. Very irritating, that."
"Ha! Maybe *you* can't fool your roomie, but mine's a... never mind." -- Mary Beth and Beth

"And this is something to brag about?? So you know your way around AOL. I know how to use an Etch & Sketch. Shouldn't be much difference....."
"Anyone else want to tell her that computers are a bit more advanced than Etch A Sketches? I've tried, but she's determined not to listen to anything that I say..." -- Mary Beth and Beth

"Besides, an editor also knows that language is fluid... creativity allows for some leeway. In other words: Close enough, bitca. :)" -- Mary Beth

"Funny story: Beth started choking on a piece of popcorn or something this weekend. I yelled "NO! You can't die!! Look at all the evidence against me!!"
"She shoved that popcorn down my throat, you know. She's trying to kill me. "Here, have some popcorn," she said innocently. "No, take more." She wanted me to choke... < g >"
"Hey Beth..... Have some lemonade." -- Mary Beth and Beth

"And they were already maimed and tortured and dead by the time they got into my story."
"And *this* is supposed to make you look better, how?" -- Beth and Mary Beth

"*monotone voice* Oh, no, please don't make me virtually wet with a virtual firehose. No, no, no. Now what will I do. Oh, pick up my virtual towel and virtually dry myself off. Then maybe I'll go have a virtual affair with Julian McMahon. Oh, and pay my half of the bills with a virtual check..." -- Beth

"Okay, MB, you hold her down, and I'll grab the popcorn.... < g >"
"*Hey*!!!! Yo! }|{! They're attacking your Trill! Sic 'em! Sic 'em, dammit!!! *Twip* them senseless already!"
"*My* popcorn now!!!! < Chaos butterfly flies away with the bag of Orville's, pausing to watch her Trill steam in fury > What?"
"Hey! *Waitadammminute*!!! Get back here and _help_, you demented little insect you!" -- Beth, Dianne, Chris, Dianne (Bystanders of Roomie Wars II)

"Hey, somebody wanna bandage mom up? See, MB, if you hadn't held her down and hurt her, your digests wouldn't be eating posts..."
"Hey! That was *your* elbow that got her in the eye...."
"Oh, dear. Poor Dee. Pillaged by roomies for popcorn." -- Beth, Mary Beth and Chris

"Are you tall enough for two titles?"
"*scoff* As if physical stature has any significance in the CoJ. Right Co-High Priestess, List Mummy??"
"Lizbet doesn't count in that rule, because she can bounce to any height she wants. < g >"
"I think that I shall just leave this comment for someone else to take on.... "
"Hey! Coming Soon to a List Near You -- Roomie Wars II: Coast to Coast Version. Beth&MaryBeth take on Lizbet&Celli! Hey! Where's everyone going?" -- Beth and Mary Beth

"Mary Beth? Beth? Why'd you quit fighting? It was starting to look like there'd be casualties, and I was amused...." -- Chris

"Ah well... at least we're entertaining everyone else during hiatus...."
"Just what I always wanted to be--the entertainment... < G > "
"When do you think we should break out the song and dance routine??"
"You mean that wasn't it?" -- Mary Beth and Beth

"no roomies were harmed in the making of this war...."
"Yet." -- Beth and Mary Beth (who thought I was kidding about the All Beth And Mary Beth Channel)

"I know! I know! It was Betsy! < Dianne points repeatedly and obnoxiously >"
"Ah, Dianne behaving like her normal self, again. Nice to see you've recovered, Dianne."
"< blink > < blink > I had a bout of niceness? When? Geez, gotta get more sleep..." -- Dianne and Betsy

"Stake 'em, stake 'em all! Out, out, damned Mary Sue!" -- Maureen

"Shit. I'm blaming fanfic on a fictional character. How pathetic am I?" -- Tina

"You ever get the urge to give the characters a call? "Hello, Rupert? Okay, the disk with the spell is stuck down there under Jenny's desk, and by the way, take care of the inscription above the door of the school. Who am I? Oh, just a friend... bye!" " -- Maureen

"Switching back and forth between these two is very disorienting. Sloalam, pilliage and plunder... I think Herc just won the ladies' gold medal in figure skating..." -- Celli

"'Sall right, Amy, even if it doesn't make sense to you, we understand it. < g > We are Fen, we're native speakers of Convoluted, and we can even make out Confused if you speak it slowly and clearly enough." -- Maureen

"Oh yeah, I forgot. It's always Elaine's fault. So there." -- Betsy

"Poor Ethan doesn't yet realize I beat the shit out of characters I don't like. < eg > That or he just doesn't care."
"Actually, Ethan *does* care. Why do you think he's talking so much?" -- Tina and Betsy

"I get into my car this morning and the sign which has been in front of my house for as long as I've lived there suddenly appeared to be saying "No Staking--Metro Bus Zone." Aaaaarrrrgh." -- Gina

"No, that would be a great big shiny duh. < g > Angel gets his soul back and bolts for the hills as we go into Summer Rerun Hell, only slightly aliviated by Fanfic Floods." -- Lizbet

"Do you know what a man and his dog can do to me?! (wait... now that didn't come out right at all.)" -- Mary Beth

"Perri, you're going to be giving birth to large exotic animals the like of which this world has never seen. *Trust* me on this one." -- Catherine

"I'm particularly miffed because Xander started talking to me about what he really thinks about Angel and what he might do if the guy got his soul back, only to clam up resolutely and walk off in search of some cheesy chips. Some fictional characters...SHEEEEESH." -- Gina

":: Gina searches the house frantically for the real honest-to-goddess police handcuffs someone gave her once, envisioning locking ListMummy to her 'puter until Angel is done talking (maybe sometime next century ::"
"Angel, me and handcuffs. And you want me to concentrate on *FIC*?!?!?!?" -- Gina and Lizbet

"And yes, if I have a choice of looking at some woman's butt, or food, food will definitely win! Not to diss Cordy's rear, but everyone's got their own priorities." -- Maureen

"I have to ask Joss if Willow's Frog Fear is a tribute to Michigan J. Frog...." -- Chris

"I'm still holding out that Joyce is some sort of demon. A motherly demon. But a demon. She leaves for a "business trip" whenever she has some nefarious demon thing to do because she wants to protect her daughter. Okay, maybe not. But, it'd be cool!" -- Abby

"Just hang for the moment, I may get lucky and not need it. I am *so* not commenting on my own phrasing, interpretation is left as an exercise for the reader. " -- Cath

"That's it, I'm going to start charging every character that says even one word to me rent. My brain is like a dorm for fictional characters." -- Tina

"Dianne, Who's sending her Muse to give Tina's Muse some Valium, ASAP..."
"Prozac, Dianne. Let's give my Muse some Prozac, ok?"
"You got it, sweetie!"
"I don't even want to know what kind of fic my Muse is going to come up with on Prozac. < g > I'd advise y'all to flee far and fast. " -- Dianne and Tina

"New rule: Nothing I write before my first caffiene of the day can be held against me." -- Dianne

"Yep, it's Lizbet. < g > Everyone stare at Lizbet now, ok? Make her feel *really* uncomfortable until she starts writing." -- Tina

"Could someone please pick Celli up off the floor after she finishes contemplating Nick in a Speedo.... wet."
"Hauled her up, dusted her off, and watched her go plop again. Fun for hours!!!" -- Mary Beth and Lizbet

" Please, don't tell me we're coming up on one of those FK-like thingies where we retcon until the cows come home and then still can't come up with a reasonable answer. Please?" -- Tina

"What with CPR and all, theoretically speaking, couldn't someone "kill" the Slayers (yes, both), then revive them? This would bring about two more Slayers. Then do the same to all four Slayers. etc etc etc. (And she killed two friends. And so on. And so on.) Next thing you know, there's an army of Slayers. Whoo hoo! Watch out vampires! < insert sound of evil laughter > You could call this the Domino Slayer Theory. (it involves vigilante gangs attacking pizza delivery trucks with wooden stakes). (Y'know, I'm starting to worry even me)."
"Oh Goddess... a renegade Watcher, a few cloves short of a bulb and all, decided this is the only way to wipe out the vamps once and for all, so he comes to Sunnydale... Nope, nope! < throws fictional characters out of head bodily > Ain't writing it!" -- Betsy and Dianne

"We could all pick our choice of character to lust over and fall over in paryoxsms of not-breathing. Oh, wait, we do that after each episode anyway, it's not a celebration." -- Tina

"I say, we set up the Hellmouth Witches Seminar: Ethan, Amy, Giles, Jenny, maybe invite that monk who was nattering about the end of the world, and brainstorm the problem. *Some*one's got to have an idea where to look for the right spell! C'mon, how hard can it be?" -- Maureen

"I think we all know she has a brain, she just hasn't allowed herself to use it much, a brain not being the current "in" fashion accessory." -- Maureen on Cordy

"Play nice (cause if you don't the ListMoms will hear about it... and we're going to be *together* so we can plot really excrutiating torments if we have to...)" -- Lizbet

"The ListMummy and I have decided that you're old enough now to stay _by yourselves_ this weekend while we're out of town effecting The End Of The World and all. (O.k., so we couldn't find a sitter willing to take on you little monsters... "po-TAY-to"... "po-TAH-to"... ;-) So don't destroy the world or break the list, and go to bed on-time, o.k.?" -- Dianne

"I don't give a damn what happens to her, I just want the Shillelaigh back." -- Dianne, after the list ignores both of the above orders

"Forms suck. They suck in a different way than vampires do, and not nearly as much, but they still suck." -- Tina

"Join the Bouncing Ones in their quest to meet Halo Boy when Dianne and Lizbet catch up with us..." -- Tina

"We could mummify Angelus. < eg > No problem." -- Tina

"The ListMummy's back and you're gonna be in trouble, hey la, hey la, the ListMummy's back. Pffffffffffffffffffffft." -- Lizbet

"My name is Tina, and I'm a fanfic slut. But, hey, I'm not a *cheap* fanfic slut, so I at least have some feelings of dignity left." -- Tina, on a roll

"See? Hours of entertainment as we torment ourselves, on any pretense whatsoever, and never any guilt." -- Pod

"When the ListMoms are away, the CyberBrood will play...and cause mass destruction... Think "round robin." Think "war." Think "excessive taunting of ListMoms when they return." -- Tina (natch)

"Abby's Pack now. That vampire is history, but he'll suffer first." -- Tina (written by Leslie)

"Hey, I had you kidnapped. You can rescue yourself; I'm not doing that too." -- Tina

"and boy was *that* an interesting and highly amusing one-way phone conversation" -- Beth

"Let's see. Pizza menu, check. Warned roommate of impending psychosis, check. What's everyone want to drink?" -- Gina

"Yow--sudden mental flash: "Magic Mayhem Madison vs. The Angel-Faced Annihilator, live on Pay-Per-View!"" -- Val

"If there was any remaining doubt, there is no longer: Cordy's a full-fledged Slayerette. Anyone who starts spouting rationalizations immediatley, reflexively, and loudly in the midst of a de-whammied crowd like that is a pro." -- Dianne

"I walked into Susan's apartment the day I had bought it, opened up to the picture with That Smile, and sputtered "*Look* what they waste on brooding and angsting!"" -- Val on David's YM pic

" makes the best letter opener, besides looking very impressive (and slightly dangerous, which can be fun) in an antique kind of way. Sort of sets one apart from the Yuppie herd, don't you think?" -- Tina's mom

"Gee, and I can't see _any_ similarities at all... " -- Dianne on Tina's mom

"At least I'm not Christina Elizabeth II, because I would hate to be a sequel. I'm more of a spinoff." --Tina

"Recipe for bringing people over to the 'Pack side of the force: remove them from their homes, family, and friends, and put them in the company of Amy and Jennie with many videotapes. Stir gently, simmer for a while on a low heat, and add chocolate occasionally. Viola, instant Natpacker! (recipe serves many)"
"Hah! < Dianne stands up, proudly displaying her battle scars > *Some* of us did this and survived with our Mercly dignity intact! Through b**ncing, and NatMares, and vids, and Ren garb, and dark of chocolate, nothing can stay a true Merc from her appointed destiny! (Hmm... except maybe "Lack of Caffiene"... need more iced tea... need now... < wanders off > )." -- ??? and Dianne

"Poor guy's gonna feel like a damn paddleball by the time he gets all his spiritual pieces back where they belong. Soul, no soul, soul, no soul, soul, Advil..." --Val

"Send the Mercs to the Mountie, not the Mountie to the Mercs... those who are truly motivated will *always* seek Paradise..." -- Chaos the Valkyrie Butterfly

"Does that mean I can go find Angel's soul and send to Vegas for a vacation until this season is over? Maybe we can track that sucker down, figure out why it keeps detaching and wandering off on its lonesome..." -- Chris

"Member of Valkyries, Rusalki, Wilis, Horsechicks, and other Women Not To Mess With, Local #46" -- Chris

"< Chris' trill Dianne chokes on her iced tea, then rolls her eyes towards the heavens and Diana, Helios, Joss, and any other deities that might be up there >" -- Dianne

"If this keeps up, I'm eventually gonna be Mama to the whole durned list, and then where'll I be? I'll tell you - trying to get everyone to go to bed at a reasonable hour, and nagging everyone to eat their veggies, and doing that Mom-look every time someone gets in a snit... Too much work! Okay, that's it, no more chilluns! No more, I say, go adopt someone else!" -- Mama Mo

"Celli got here Friday and I have already concealed her body in a little-visited canyon off of Mulhulland..." -- Lizbet

"Should Eyghon make his way back somehow, and there's no convenient Angelus Ex Machina to let himself be turned into demon Silly Putty for a while..." -- Valerie

""Buffy is my Slayer,
I shall not want.
She maketh me to lie down in cemetaries
She drop-kicketh me into still waters,
She restoreth my soul...
She leadeth me in the paths of Angel-ness for her sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Spike,
I will fear no evil, for Buffy art with me,
Thy rod and thy stake they comfort me..."
Thou preparest torture for me in the presence of mine enemies.
My cup runneth over.
Surely Buffy shall follow me all the nights of my life."
< snicker! > Every catechism teacher I ever had is now howling in agony." -- Maureen

"Am *not* obsesseed. Okay. *Am* obsessed, but it's not a *bad* thing!" -- Mary Beth

"Ow! I've been < thwip > ped by a butterfly. That's a first. "
"But somehow, I suspect, not a last." -- Maureen and Chris

Maureen (which means: she who knows more ancient pop-culture references than anyone else on this list. "Buffy who?" indeed!)
"< frowns in childish curiousity > So, would those be found on parchment or cuneiform tablets?"
"Cave paintings!" -- Maureen and Dianne

"I'm exploring the concept of mental health, I want to see how far I can take it..." -- Chris

"I asked her to bring Seth back in her carry-on. (I asked for Tony, but she said she wouldn't have space in her suitcase, since she's packing David in that). " -- Betsy

"I wonder if Jessica Fletcher lived on top of a Hellmouth? That would explain all the murders. Hell, maybe Jessica Fletcher was a Hellmouth." -- Tina

"Jack's commentary during the pan thru apt. & up stairs: "He really went all out...he has *no* life, does he?"" -- Valerie

"So now he thinks he's the Nightcrawler...? -- Valerie

"Valerie points out that Kiki is perfectly allowed to be peeved w/ Ty and Joss. Joss is in charge, Ty accepted the point-man position... They knew the risks when they signed on. " -- Valerie

" Jack put it, "It completes the monster matches. A vampire, a werewolf, a monster, and a...whatever Cordy is." -- Val on Jenny-as-a-ghost

"Now she's *really* stuck with Xander; no other guy is gonna go parking with her with several bulbs of garlic strung across the back seat..." -- Val on Cordelia

"Now, however, my authorial ass is firmly seated in the Chair-o-Denial." -- Elaine

"Methinks somebody gave her Universal Translator technology, and Angel got overzealous in enforcing the Prime Directive..." -- Val

"I want to do an auto-da-fe with Joss as the main course." -- Chris

"Leslie and Celli and I shall be evicerating Joss on the 4th. Wish you were here." -- Lizbet

"I'm not letting Joss play with my toys anymore, 'cuz he can't be trusted not to break them. :-p" - Dianne

"Come, come and join us in the lovely land of Denial, where Last Knight never happened, Richie still lives, and Nick (Knight, not Brendon) has a clue. Captain Katie is living on another floor in our building, busily pretending she doesn't have the hots for her first officer and that she's still on a Starfleet ship that will make it back to the Alpha quadrant in one piece. It's a wonderful place to visit, but it's really a better place to live. Denial: it's not just a state of mind, it's a whole separate country." -- Tina

"The day I bounce is the day Angelus decides that it's better to live and let live!" -- Lizbet

"Dead's no fun. Alive and suffering is amusing." -- Chris

"Student, please notice the appropriate use of the Emergence from Denial procedure #4 (Advanced): Ardent Denial (to camouflage the emergency effort) combined with Code Word #2 (pout)." -- Betsy

"I fear this guy. Or possibly love him." -- Lizbet on Joss

"They've already beat on Giles enough in the Jenny department, can we please just allow the boy his smoochies in peace?" -- Cath

"Ever dream that Rupert Giles was a vampire and you, Xander, and Cordelia were stuck in a computer lab with him? Don't. It's really bad when you kick the monsters in your dream and they don't fall down. At least there were chopsticks in the computer lab for me to stake him with. " -- Tina

"Yep, death is too good for me. I know this, and I know all the Angel Droolers also know this. That's why I'm having such fun with this." -- Tina

"Honey, I have *no* problem believing that. There's a *reason* we were all ready to drop-kick him a couple months back, remember? 'Cause we had all griped and groaned about him being closed-mouthed, so he finally said "Fine!" and started bombing us with three or four stories apiece simultaneously? Little did we know how good we had it... ~meep~" -- Valerie on Angel

"I mean, if *your* family had a history of lycanthropy, wouldn't *you* keep some kinky stuff in the attic under the Christmas decorations?" -- Cath

"Hey, has anyone ever noticed the parallels between Buffy and Star Wars? We got the Light side, the side of good and peace and bunny rabbits, defended by fighters who have to trust their feelings of the "force" ("you have to... hone") and who use specialized weaponry (lightsabers = stakes). And we got the Dark side, personified by an evilbadnasty guy who wears lots of black leather (down, droolers, I'm talkin' about the Master and/or Spike!). And an older, wiser father-type figure who provides training and weapons (Giles = Obi Wan), as well as two sidekicks (C3PO and R2D2 = Xander and Willow) - can't you just see Willow scurrying down that canyon looking for Obi Wan, meeping piteously and twitching as it gets darker?" -- Maureen

"But they were *pretty*! And had nice wooden parts with pretty, well treated, nice, hard woods. *smile* I mean...the fact that they can also be used to cause mortal damage...well, that's *secondary* to the technical, technologic, and aesthetic qualities that make them fascinating. Honest." -- Amy on crossbows

"He's *cool*, though--evil, and vicious, and a Plot Device." -- Tina on Angelus

"Giles drooling is *never* wrong! And certainly nothing to be ashamed of. I heartily encourage Giles drooling - just don't get the man _too_ messy. 'Cause then, see, I'd need to take off that tweed and take it to be dry-cleaned, leaving the poor dear with nothing to wear... Um, go ahead, drool all you want!" -- Maureen

"My mind broke." --Tina

"Maybe he could turn Hank. Almanzo Wilder as a vampire--wiggsome, huh?" -- Tina

"Well, if it was People for the Ethical Treatment of Angel (Real) Droolers it would be PETARD... who would get hoisted, I wonder..." -- Lizbet messing with Mary Beth's mind

"You killed Angel? *How* is this an improvement?????"
"I'm < not > killing Angel, I'm just working my feelings of Angelus out through constructive fiction. It's therapy!" -- Mary Beth and Dawn

"Hey, I may like to torture my friends, but only in a non-something I can't think of right now kind of way." -- Tina

"I'm so glad my thudding amuses everyone. You'd think I had started a large East Coast fault line to rival the San Andreas." -- Leslie

"Maybe they'll put up a "Find Angel's Soul" game. That could be amusing in a tortured kinda way." -- Sheryl

"Some of us want to remain pure and unspoiled."
"Well, let's not ask for the impossible here, Grannie. Us, pure? "
"Didn't you know that Delusion is right next door to Denial? Geez, didn't they teach you kids any geography in that college of yours? -- Betsy and Lizbet

"I wanted to make it perfectly crystal-clear to *everyone* that if I "accidentally" find out more than I want to know, I will have to come to whatever town you live in and do some damage to your body and your Buffy tapes. Capisce?"
"ULP. Now *that's* a dire warning. My body, now, probably can't really be damaged much more than it already is (let's not discuss the Evil Workout Instructor From Hell(tm) who nearly killed me two nights ago). My Buffy tapes, however -- :: quiver :: what else do I have, after all, to sustain me through the Angelus horrors (and all the extremely tormenting fic-attacks) but my memories? :: sob :: " -- Lizbet and Gina

"But we *always* treat you like a twelve-year-old child. Maybe when you're older you'll recognize this." -- Betsy

"Are you a glutton for punishment? Do you feel like reading some really bad fic? Wanna Beta for me? I'll help reformat your hard drive after you realize it's the only way to completely forget the dreck you just read." -- Abby

"Yeah, Tina's turning into quite the little drool-slut. (< blink > Did I *say* that? :)))" -- Dianne

"What, you mean you don't want to know that Angel and Richard Simmons form a partnership and storm the fitness world with a best-selling workout video called "Sweatin' to the Torture?" You didn't want to know the spoilers about Jenny ditching Giles to run off with Chris Lorenzo (who is most emphatically alive), while Rita "educates" Xander about women? You don't want to know when Giles moves to Seacouver, where he and a Methos bond on a bookish level and plot to kill a certain annoying-as-hell Scot? I can't believe you don't want to know about the part in the season finale where Buffy and Willow run off to Gotham City and become superheroes? Jeez, I can't *believe* you didn't want the spoilers for that! I mean, how can you *not*?" -- Tina

"Just another one-way trip on Boo Airlines..." -- Cath

"Boo!!! You are a thing of *evil*! You must write this! Now!!! (I know, but grad school, schmad school! This is *important*!!! :)" -- Dianne

"Usually, on Thursday or Friday, I grab the tv guide at the supermarket, elbow away (nicely) the little grannies who want to check out the crossword section in it, and look up Tuesday nights visual gratification. It's not much of a system, but it works for me." -- Anya

"I was doing so well on letting Giles press his nose to the window of my fic-house, and camp out in the yard, but I didn't wanna let him in! I think he went all industrious on me and dug under the side wall..." -- Cath

"On the net, no one thinks you're a weirdo anymore!" -- Dianne la Mercenaire

"So now I wanna know-- just how weird am I?" -- Dianne

"Let the games begin! It's the SunS Olympics - we would have started with a torch bearer, but all the pyros on-list got into a big huge fight over who would carry the torch, and it accidently went out, so then they started trying out all their various methods of lighting fires, and got distracted..." -- Maureen

"Um, you stopped it. In the middle of good smut." --Tina

"Great! I can't even impersonate myself." --Betsy

"And I'm < not > twisted!!!!"
"What's important is that you believe that..." -- Dawn and Lizbet

"And if Angel had such a strong impulse to take care of Willow, Angelus has an equally strong impulse to destroy her, to the point of taking her first even though it will screw the hell out of his nice artistic stalking pattern." -- Valerie

"At this point there's only one bit of Angelus I want. On a platter. No, dear, I don't want to kill him, beheading kills vampires. Try something else." --Lizbet

"I am *so* afraid on general principle to even think how many sigs I'm in at any given moment. (Was that a sentence?)"
"Yes, it was. It was also a .sig. " -- Dianne and Tina

"If I could see him at 7 in the morning, pie-eyed, messy hair, walking around in his boxers.... I wouldn't be saying much more than *blawhaahawa*.Who am i kidding? I wouldn't be saying much at all! < wg >"
"No sweetie, the proper response to seeing David in such circumstances is: "Come back to bed, hon. < g > ""
"He's doing this on purpose, isn't he? Torturing us. He's *evil*. I *knew* I liked this guy!!!!" -- Mary Beth, Sheryl and Lizbet

"Oh, sorry. Where was I? Oh, yeah...the gutter. Never mind." -- Leslie

"Bad Hair Day strikes Sunnydale-- notable victims: Oz (Please re-dye it, sweetie. _Trust_ me!), Jenny (Perri-- "What happened to her hair? It's certainly _flat_ today...."), and Buffy in the library with the note from Angelus (If *I'm* noticing the friggin' hair, it's *bad*....)." -- Dianne

"What in the heck made her think that calling on *Diana* was a good idea for a _love-spell_, huh? Hecate for the animals and general witchy-type things, sure... but *Diana*?!?!?!?! Ancient Patron Goddess of I-*So*-Do-Not-Need-A-Man-For-_Anything_?" -- Dianne

"She has no taste. The proper response is: "You're kidding? It's actually _good_? Gee, I'll have to watch it this week." Then you high-five Perri as a kick-ass BuffyCorrupter and prepare your VCR for the inevitable dubbing fest." -- Dianne

"Angel in leather pants should definitely be a controlled substance--yeah, and under my control." -- Leslie

"And I thought we'd given up on that "Let's try to pretend we're sane" approach... I'm always the last to hear..." -- Dianne

Welcome to the SunS don't be frightened. We aren't all insane. What? We aren't ALL insane. There are a few sane people hiding around here somewhere. Aren't there? " -- Sasha

"Don't worry, there's really only three of us on this list. We just are all signed at different e-mail addies with different personas. Makes the flame wars interesting, though; I really must remember to unsub myself for a week for that last comment. Quite uncalled for, if I do say so myself... (What? I have my own fun, OK?)" -- Lizbet

"And if it's a matter of knowing the particular ritual involved, surely there must be more than one way to skin an Angel, as it were."
"Okay. I've completely lost all my verbal and comprehension abilities. I read this as "there must be more than one way to see Angel skin." Then my brain set up shop in the gutter; I'm getting some real wear out of the throw pillows down there." -- Cath and Leslie

"Cursing demons should surely be an entire *category* in Giles' "Dewey Decimal System: Occult Version". Though I suppose cursing the Slayer's honey isn't something one just "wings", huh? A cough in the wrong spot, and *poof*! Vampire toad..." -- Cath

"(Okay, did I *really* need to provide an image of Methos licking himself? And I was really gonna get something done today, too...)" -- Cath

"Geeking is good... just think, all those nice heavy books, thus to wonk Giles over the head and drag him back to her cave... oh wait, geeking, geeeking, right..." -- Cath

"y'all are so cute. you bring out the slut in me." -- Cath

"Dammit, Boo! Shut up already! My poor, beleagured .sig can't take much more!!!" -- Dianne to Cath

""Oooh, I'm in two .sigs at the same time. This is way cool! I wonder if I can make it three?" --Betsy (in Amy's .sig)

"One of the signs of the Apocalypse: the Broncos won the SuperBowl. :> Now, if the Cubs win the World Series next year, we'll *know* the world's gonna end soon....." --Kiki

"And I didn't mean Jenny and Methos *romantically*. I just all of a sudden had a flash of them out-dead-panning each other and the brain spazzed." -- Lizbet

"It's a *GOOD* feeling to be in control of your life! I am strong! I am powerful! I am woman, hear me roar! I am in a chat room with the two quote list Princesses, ACK!" -- Lizbet

"I am Keeper of the Quote list. I shall have my revenge! :P"
"Oh, go quote yourself! < g > To some people, that might be an insult. *looks at Dianne*" -- Perri and Tina

"Does anyone remember the name of Kendra's Watcher? Sam Nabuto, right?"
"Close. Sam Zabuto. Having checked because I also didn't need for fic in any way, shape or form..."
"I'm glad you looked because I didn't need it either... " -- Tina, Valerie, Lizbet

"*Must* get this done and get Angelus fucking out of my head. The fuck out of my head. He's not fucking in my head. Oh, fuck." -- Tina

"I don't have to worry about making the quotelist for a *while*, now. < Kiki grins happily, having a little Boo comfort-zone present to take the heat off her. Not to mention everyone else > "
"Yeah, now you all know why I voted for her. You thought it was 'cuz she was a HorseChick and general all around cool psycho type, but no! I wanted the only person who mouths off as shamelessly and often in public as I do securely on-list to split the "Quote List Victim of the Week" duties with me again! < vwg > " -- *silly* Kiki and Death Wish Dianne

"Spike was probably as he is now, a natural leader and a restless mind in need of activity."
"Like Xander, with severe ADD? < g > Oh, great, now I'm trying to imagine what Xander would be like as a vampire. I really have to have a talk with my brain about the places it goes. I don't like the company it keeps sometimes, and if it doesn't stop that, I'm going to give it a severe talking to."
"Don't. That's all I have to say. Just...don't."
"But just think! He'd have to hang out outside of 7-11 or AM/PM's in order to attack the people eating Twinkiees to get his junk food fix!" -- Valerie and Lizbet

"My dream ep involves an hour of watching Buffy beat the living **** out of the Spice Girls. This would give me *such* the happy...." -- Dianne

"Vamps of a feather suck together" -- Cath

"Xander's life is more complicated than he is." -- Sheryl

"Ah, that smile. It hides a heart of darkness but it could melt butter." --Sheryl

"I am really starting to worship my man Oz. One week he finds out he's in a B movie, the next he finds out he *is* a B movie, and he's still able to appreciate the truly wacked irony of it all." -- Cath

"But you're the one writing it."
"And that matters why? I decide I want the story to go one way, and the characters decide they're going to take the story *way* the hell over in the other direction." -- Tina attempting explain about 'having people' to Paul the engineer

"Finally, I see at least a dim bulb at the end of the tunnel, and no pullcord for Angelus to come and turn it off." -- Tina

"Ooh, I *hate* Angelus. Please, tell me no one else is channelling him. If someone else is, wow, I pity them. We could form a support group. "Angelus: People Who Hate Him, People Who Channel Him, People Who Want Angel Back." -- Tina

"Territorialism in fandom is one of the lesser-known ways of committing suicide, y'know." -- Cath

"Oooo, what a shock, AngelDroolers think he is a sensitive artist. If he's a musician of any kind too, I'm going into hormonal overload and staying there..." -- Lizbet

"MMmmmmmaybe what we need here, is a sort of sub-sub-group-- the SunS FARAP-- the Sunnydale Slayers' Fully-Automated [armed?] Rupert Admiration Phalanx. We could have a secret handshake, and a motto, and *everything*!" -- Elaine

"Should be a busy wake." -- Chris

"I would be freaking like, "Oh my God, there's a giant demon two feet away, even if this is the Hellmouth, that's weird!" What did all of the Sunnydale residents think? Hey, there's someone in major need of a make-over, good thing he came to the mall." " -- Debra Ann

"I love anywhere where people regularly have "corollary wigs."" -- Dianne

"Would it help if I said 'uff-da!'?" -- Mo

"And no, I am not having way too many thoughts on this one minor point because of a [non-fanfic] non-story I'm not writing that would not deal with this sort of non-issue. So there! :-p" -- Dianne

"I think Angel's mad at me from when I pushed the bureau up against the door and wouldn't let him in to tell me about what happened when Willow showed up at his door with her demon-ridding plan. (You think she was nervous when *he* came into *her* room?) He's sorta spitting out little fragments at me and then disappearing. Angel! Nobody likes a sulky vampire! Come back and tell *someone* besides Perri something nice about where you are right now and when you're coming back before we all torture ourselves into complete wig. (I swear to god I just heard a little voice in my head say "Oh, so *now* you want to talk, do you?")" -- Gina

"Dianne has evil-awful-terrible thought of the next RR being Angel's soul being returned... and bounced around from character to character all over Sunnyhell... <*thwaps* brain... grounds it indefinitely...>)" -- Dianne

"But it's so much fun down here! On one side there's Mo and the other GASPers wetting down Giles, on the other is Mary Beth, Leslie and the others admiring Angel in leather pants... and in the middle is me with chains." -- Abby

"Maybe there's a reason for all this BESIDES Angel gets to wear leather pants." -- Celli

"So what would you call Buffy and Angel fans?"
"Masochists?" -- Mary Beth and Beth

"It's not original, but in a small town like Sunnydale the amusement park isn't open yet." -- Mary Beth (setting a fic at the mini-golf course)

"It's a rapidly expanding city where people are dying faster than you can say Hellmouth." --- Mary Beth on Sunnydale

"What, I'm going to cross the threshold of our apartment and turn into Dru?" -- Celli the Bat-Fink TRAITOR!!!! [Ed. Give in to your inner NatPacker...]

"Sssssssssh! Be wery, wery qwiet. I'm huntin' 'Packers." -- Lizbet

"What is this, fang envy?" -- Perri, on Angelus vs. Oz the wolf

"'I'm naked in the woods. Hmmm. Interesting.'" -- Oz, according to Dee

"He's a pterodactyl?!" -- Lizbet, just prior to Larry's revelation

"I think the Hellmouth has a direct relationship to the Bronze...."
"Maybe there's a Hellnose?" -- Perri and Val

"I guess she's going to find out if she likes guys with hairy backs." -- Lizbet, on Willow & Oz

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